Exactly what is an interaction?

My goal, in the category of Relating & Relationships, is “To practice Stealth-Influence in every interaction.” I’ve described what I mean by Stealth-Influence, somewhat, and now I will elaborate on what I mean by “interaction.”

So what is an interaction, anyway?

My thoughts started out with a vague idea of what constituted an interaction:

• any time I am speaking with someone (or more than one)
• any time there is an opportunity for conversation and I want to initiate, or not speaking would be considered rude
• when I meet someone
• if it is a choice between being indifferent and being friendly always choose friendly behavior

I had it stuck in my head that an interaction was only when verbal behavior was occurring. The word behavior got me to thinking. Communication encompasses both verbal and non-verbal behavior.

A smile is definitely an effective means of communicating friendliness, support, encouragement, or several other possibilities, a threat even. Well, that was interesting. Suddenly the potential of an interaction expanded greatly. An interaction could be a conversation, a single word, or no words at all, just body language.

What about my writing? I don’t even need to be present for my words, symbols of my thoughts, to influence others. My presence wasn’t even a necessity. That was intriguing.

How about this: If someone I’m not aware of sees me at the grocery store, considers me to be in good physical condition, then sees the food I have in my grocery cart (all healthy choices) they might be influenced to think about their diet and habits of health. I don’t even need to be aware of my influence for it to have an effect.

So what have I concluded?

My life is how I influence people. I can’t refrain from interacting with the world. Everything I do exerts an influence. I can never be certain that something I say or something I do will not have an effect.

So I must ask myself this question: “Is my life having a positive influence?”

If I can answer honestly that it is at least 51% positive and only 49% negative then I can go to sleep nightly knowing that I am making a positive difference with my life. Obviously, I would like the positive influence to far outweigh the negative but I know that I am not perfect. If I can be better tomorrow than I was today that’s a trend I can live with and that is a goal worth pursuing.

Bottom line, “To practice Stealth-Influence in every interaction” means to exert my influence toward the positive in the moment of choice. The relationships I have with others is an extension of the relationship I have with myself. By making the positive choice, within myself, I am doing all I can to positively influence everything else.

Positive? Says you!

Who determines what is positive? I do, when it comes to my own life. You do, when it comes to your life. We exert influence on each other and so does everyone else. As long as no one is initiating force as a means of influence we all have the freedom to choose what is positive for ourselves. That is the basis of a free society – freedom from physical coercion. There can be no authority higher than our own choice.

Well, that post started out simply enough. It ended with a little politico-moralizing. I wonder how this will go out into the world and influence things. I’m sure of one thing, I chose my words with care. I’ll be sleeping soundly tonight.